Death by Tabasco - Part 1

I didn't know it would kill him.

He loved Tabasco sauce and he liked it when I put a few drops in his popcorn oil. But that night I think I over did it...a little. I'm not sure what gave that away. Was it the cloud of red smoke? Or the fumes that made me sneeze and cough so much so, that I had to run outside to breathe?

I could never be sure, but Clive started coughing so hard that he doubled over, fell out of his chair and hit his head against the corner of the coffee table, the one I kept telling him to get rid of because, "someone is going to trip and smash their head or take out an eye."

I couldn't help thinking, as Clive's blood oozed out onto the rug (granted, it wasn't a huge puddle, but it did start to flow) that I just spent booku bucks on to get it cleaned.

I'm Clive's wife, Dee. I'm your average Joe...er...Jolene. I will never make it into the history books, but I'd like to think I contributed something useful and in fact I did: Tabasco popcorn!

You have to be careful about how many drips you put into the oil or, like me tonight, you'll have to open the windows so that you won't suffocate.

After opening the windows and the smoke started to dissipate, I did the next logical thing. I sat down in front of the TV and started eating the popcorn. It was too late for Clive and I he wouldn't be wanting any at this point and chose to let him lie there. I figured another hour wouldn't hurt him.

Anyway, Clive was too ornery to start decomposing until after the ball game was over. Come to think of it, I could sit here and watch anything I wanted. I switched it immediately over to find Gone with the Wind was airing. How nice.

I know. You're thinking, "Is she crazy?!"

Some would say, "Yes," depending on who you talked to. Besides, you've got to be a little crazy to make it in the world today. And, after years of cleaning up after Clive and our two ungrateful sons, I decided that I deserved a peaceful moment or two.